I was so proud of my Samsung Star mobile cell until last Monday!
It had a touch screen and an MP3 and a 3.2 Megapixel camera and I had put an additional memory card which gave me access to the world of music where I had about 180 songs in the MP3 format. It looked so sexy with its white metal body and a slot for the stylus to settle in cozily. I used to listen to my favorite German, Marathi, English, Spanish numbers again and again and I had created a world of my own where no one else was allowed to enter. Music takes me to another plane altogether and I like to laze there for hours and hours. My mom often told me not to plug the earphones and listen to songs for hours together as that reduces the hearing capacity. She believes that I will soon become deaf and she often cribs how this generation is going to be deaf at an early age of 35 yrs. I sometimes listen to her and sometimes turn a deaf ear to her pleas and listened to music sometimes!
But all this bliss of mine ended when I was unable to navigate into the menu of my cell after receiving an SMS from one friend of mine on a Monday morning. I spent around half an hour shutting it down and restarting it but in vain. The competency of my cell was now reduced to only incoming and making calls to the last received call. Slowly about 25 messages were visible on the screen and I couldn’t open a single SMS and read them. I had to ask some friends on mail regarding the context of the SMS and check with them if I missed something important. I was beginning to feel frustrated and it was becoming increasingly difficult as I was carrying a mobile phone, but was not able to use it. I was waiting patiently for the weekend when I could go to the service center and get it repaired.
My hubby was constantly teasing me on how lost I must be feeling for not being stuck on the cell phone all the time. According to him, I talk a lot on the phone and waste my energy and time. If I would have spent my energy on something “better” according to him would have taken me somewhere else is what he believes. Who knows, talking to people I love makes me feel connected to them and that is like a fuel to my engine of life. I can’t think of sitting quietly in a room with my best friend Sudhir, Koustubh, Milind, or my mother-in-law or mom. As I hardly meet all these people in person now, I talk to them on and off on phone. But, my reticent husband does not understand this and I do not get into it too. I just nod and say yes, you are right. This solves half of the arguments even before starting them, isn’t it?
With the shock of my cell phone has lost its ability to make calls, I got another jerk and realized while having gone for shopping that my debit card is not in its usual place where it sits gracefully amongst the other cards. I searched for it frantically in all places in my usual purse, at home, in other purses, but no it vanished as if it had wings and it could fly. I immediately blocked it and checked the balance. Thankfully, it was not as bad as I had expected. All the figures were intact and I could see some sunshine in the dark and rainy clouds. I then figured out that I had left it in the office ATM when I had gone there to withdraw the change for giving it to the cab driver. After that, I do not seem to have bothered about the card unless I went shopping the other day. How forgetful of me! This happened to me for the first time in 9 years of my debit card handling. And I was so confident that I could handle everything very smoothly. But there are certain situations, which help you to introspect and clear off your airs about your self-image.
The timing was perfect.
I wanted to enroll for Kannada classes
I wanted to pay the fees for aerobics
I wanted to go to the parlor to get a facial done.
And I had no cell phone to make calls, inquire and fix an appointment and I had no debit card to withdraw money to do the above-mentioned things.
Temporarily, my dear husband offered to become my financer until I got myself a new card! I was thrilled at this idea and started making plans on how to loot him and how should I make the most of this very uncommon chance. But then my initial enthusiasm got thinner and thinner and vanished in no time. He gave me money, which was enough for the week, rather more than enough for the week, but then I just couldn’t ask for money for other things which I was wanting to do. Why did this happen?
This set me thinking.
If at all, I was to sit at home and take care of my future kids, how would life be? My husband would give all the necessary monetary support to me, but then how comfortable would I be to ask him money all the time for small things? Financial independence is such a great boon, I thought. Being in a position to buy all the material things which would give you happiness makes you feel like a king of your life. But then where are the dependency and the belongingness which stems from this dependency between husband and wife? In earlier times, money was not a very important factor and the home-maker wife was so happy managing the house with whatever little her husband gave her for the monthly chores. But then the needs were also less and so was the desire to own material objects and showcase them. A small, cozy home, enough for the couple, their parents, and their children housed so many relatives and occasions throughout the year. There was so much fun and joy to celebrate festivals together, laugh, and talk together. Money was hardly a matter of concern in those days. But then nuclear families paved the way for the breakdown of joint families and the whole scene changed and everybody slowly become secluded and confined to their own happiness and joy and immediate family.
This temporary dependence on my husband taught me a few valuable lessons, which I would have learned a harder way than this.
It taught me to control my expenses and desires to hoard things every week. With my money, I had collected so many things which I hardly used. I had so many books, which I had hardly read. I decided to give them away to the library, at least someone else would read them. I had so many bags and accessories, which I gave away to my maid’s daughter. I concentrated more on the home-front, cleaned up my shelf, cupboards, and kitchen. I had a strange feeling of suddenly becoming a homemaker who carefully and meticulously plans the budget and other stuff of her home. I started wondering, how would it be if I choose to become a homemaker too? It wouldn’t be a bad idea as long as I enjoy doing what I like.
And the absence of my cell made me empty-handed and less pre-occupied. All the time, I would be hooked to the cell, either reading an SMS or making a call or listening to music.
Why should I be available to the world 24/7? Do I have no privacy, no time to call my own? Shouldn’t I be having a dialogue with myself rather than talking unimportant things to some tom, dick and harry? Where was the time to take care of my hobbies or other intrinsic things which would give me inner peace and happiness? I hardly read or write anything these days. I had kind of got off track in my office-home-office routine. So, now with this temporary dependency, I won my freedom and time to do things which would give me some breathing space and give me the energy to do more things in a better way.
You all must have been surprised by the title of this write-up, “Stranded”, isn’t it? Being stranded enables you to realize your true potentials and gives you a different vision to tackle things and face the problem. So, having lost my debit card and connectivity to the outside world, I actually felt better than I had expected. Those who have a positive frame of mind would always look at such an opportunity to try out something different and those with a negative frame of mind would sob, fret and curse and say, “why me”?
So, instead of asking the question, why me, Why I had to lose my debit card and why my cell conked off, I took it as a chance to bond with my hubby, my books, my writing and yes, I spent less and bought things which were essential and not the ones which were desirable.
What would you do, had you being stranded, just like me?
It had a touch screen and an MP3 and a 3.2 Megapixel camera and I had put an additional memory card which gave me access to the world of music where I had about 180 songs in the MP3 format. It looked so sexy with its white metal body and a slot for the stylus to settle in cozily. I used to listen to my favorite German, Marathi, English, Spanish numbers again and again and I had created a world of my own where no one else was allowed to enter. Music takes me to another plane altogether and I like to laze there for hours and hours. My mom often told me not to plug the earphones and listen to songs for hours together as that reduces the hearing capacity. She believes that I will soon become deaf and she often cribs how this generation is going to be deaf at an early age of 35 yrs. I sometimes listen to her and sometimes turn a deaf ear to her pleas and listened to music sometimes!
But all this bliss of mine ended when I was unable to navigate into the menu of my cell after receiving an SMS from one friend of mine on a Monday morning. I spent around half an hour shutting it down and restarting it but in vain. The competency of my cell was now reduced to only incoming and making calls to the last received call. Slowly about 25 messages were visible on the screen and I couldn’t open a single SMS and read them. I had to ask some friends on mail regarding the context of the SMS and check with them if I missed something important. I was beginning to feel frustrated and it was becoming increasingly difficult as I was carrying a mobile phone, but was not able to use it. I was waiting patiently for the weekend when I could go to the service center and get it repaired.
My hubby was constantly teasing me on how lost I must be feeling for not being stuck on the cell phone all the time. According to him, I talk a lot on the phone and waste my energy and time. If I would have spent my energy on something “better” according to him would have taken me somewhere else is what he believes. Who knows, talking to people I love makes me feel connected to them and that is like a fuel to my engine of life. I can’t think of sitting quietly in a room with my best friend Sudhir, Koustubh, Milind, or my mother-in-law or mom. As I hardly meet all these people in person now, I talk to them on and off on phone. But, my reticent husband does not understand this and I do not get into it too. I just nod and say yes, you are right. This solves half of the arguments even before starting them, isn’t it?
With the shock of my cell phone has lost its ability to make calls, I got another jerk and realized while having gone for shopping that my debit card is not in its usual place where it sits gracefully amongst the other cards. I searched for it frantically in all places in my usual purse, at home, in other purses, but no it vanished as if it had wings and it could fly. I immediately blocked it and checked the balance. Thankfully, it was not as bad as I had expected. All the figures were intact and I could see some sunshine in the dark and rainy clouds. I then figured out that I had left it in the office ATM when I had gone there to withdraw the change for giving it to the cab driver. After that, I do not seem to have bothered about the card unless I went shopping the other day. How forgetful of me! This happened to me for the first time in 9 years of my debit card handling. And I was so confident that I could handle everything very smoothly. But there are certain situations, which help you to introspect and clear off your airs about your self-image.
The timing was perfect.
I wanted to enroll for Kannada classes
I wanted to pay the fees for aerobics
I wanted to go to the parlor to get a facial done.
And I had no cell phone to make calls, inquire and fix an appointment and I had no debit card to withdraw money to do the above-mentioned things.
Temporarily, my dear husband offered to become my financer until I got myself a new card! I was thrilled at this idea and started making plans on how to loot him and how should I make the most of this very uncommon chance. But then my initial enthusiasm got thinner and thinner and vanished in no time. He gave me money, which was enough for the week, rather more than enough for the week, but then I just couldn’t ask for money for other things which I was wanting to do. Why did this happen?
This set me thinking.
If at all, I was to sit at home and take care of my future kids, how would life be? My husband would give all the necessary monetary support to me, but then how comfortable would I be to ask him money all the time for small things? Financial independence is such a great boon, I thought. Being in a position to buy all the material things which would give you happiness makes you feel like a king of your life. But then where are the dependency and the belongingness which stems from this dependency between husband and wife? In earlier times, money was not a very important factor and the home-maker wife was so happy managing the house with whatever little her husband gave her for the monthly chores. But then the needs were also less and so was the desire to own material objects and showcase them. A small, cozy home, enough for the couple, their parents, and their children housed so many relatives and occasions throughout the year. There was so much fun and joy to celebrate festivals together, laugh, and talk together. Money was hardly a matter of concern in those days. But then nuclear families paved the way for the breakdown of joint families and the whole scene changed and everybody slowly become secluded and confined to their own happiness and joy and immediate family.
This temporary dependence on my husband taught me a few valuable lessons, which I would have learned a harder way than this.
It taught me to control my expenses and desires to hoard things every week. With my money, I had collected so many things which I hardly used. I had so many books, which I had hardly read. I decided to give them away to the library, at least someone else would read them. I had so many bags and accessories, which I gave away to my maid’s daughter. I concentrated more on the home-front, cleaned up my shelf, cupboards, and kitchen. I had a strange feeling of suddenly becoming a homemaker who carefully and meticulously plans the budget and other stuff of her home. I started wondering, how would it be if I choose to become a homemaker too? It wouldn’t be a bad idea as long as I enjoy doing what I like.
And the absence of my cell made me empty-handed and less pre-occupied. All the time, I would be hooked to the cell, either reading an SMS or making a call or listening to music.
Why should I be available to the world 24/7? Do I have no privacy, no time to call my own? Shouldn’t I be having a dialogue with myself rather than talking unimportant things to some tom, dick and harry? Where was the time to take care of my hobbies or other intrinsic things which would give me inner peace and happiness? I hardly read or write anything these days. I had kind of got off track in my office-home-office routine. So, now with this temporary dependency, I won my freedom and time to do things which would give me some breathing space and give me the energy to do more things in a better way.
You all must have been surprised by the title of this write-up, “Stranded”, isn’t it? Being stranded enables you to realize your true potentials and gives you a different vision to tackle things and face the problem. So, having lost my debit card and connectivity to the outside world, I actually felt better than I had expected. Those who have a positive frame of mind would always look at such an opportunity to try out something different and those with a negative frame of mind would sob, fret and curse and say, “why me”?
So, instead of asking the question, why me, Why I had to lose my debit card and why my cell conked off, I took it as a chance to bond with my hubby, my books, my writing and yes, I spent less and bought things which were essential and not the ones which were desirable.
What would you do, had you being stranded, just like me?
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